angry_geologist

There is a God. Who else would have the power to f#*$ with me like this?

1) Still haven't found a new job, but that's okay because I've got as much work as I can handle. I'm better off than many in this economy- guess I'm just going to have to grin and bear it.

1a) Even if my current client doesn't appear to have any concept of reality. ProTip: if it takes someone a full week of concerted work to do the first plan, it's going to take longer than eight hours to do the second.

1b) And we're still losing people at the office. Granted, they're leaving voluntarily, but they're still leaving. All the empty cubes are starting to make me nervous

3) Still visiting the nursing home. There's some people in there... I've got to wonder what their lives were like before. There are some interesting stories, and I hope I've got time to tell them.

4) Went out for Halloween as a preppy vampire. Found a bar I liked. Found out today said bar had it's last night open on Saturday, and is now closed permanently. I think that's par for the course...

5) Found a guy that I liked who had a great sense of humor and an actual job that goes somewhere. Guy appears to like me. Guy is also a grand total of 15 years older than me. This, it seems, is also par for the course.

6) NaNoWriMo BRB

Yeah... it's been an embarrassingly long time since I've written.

So what's new?

-I'm trying to find a new job.
-I'm taking Roland to visit the Jewish Home every Monday.
-I've finally found a RP group
--which I may be losing due to job changes.
-I finally took a train trip
--to Philly
---where I went to Wizard World Philly
----where Edward James Olmos told me to go back for my PhD
-----which I'm seriously considering.
-I've lost enough weight so that I am no longer in danger of metabolic syndrome (whew!)
-I'm knitting socks.

I'm also considering upgrading this blog and potentially moving to another platform. Or at least updating on a more regular basis, which I'm sure you will all like.

I ran my first-ever 5K today. My lungs are shouting at my brain for not telling them how long a "K" was.

It wasn't any big deal, of course- it was just a fun run, to raise money for a local domestic violence shelter. Seems a good a cause as any to get off my butt.

It... probably wasn't the best day for it. It was nice and sunny, yes, but it was hot and humid. And I'm certain I didn't drink enough water before the race started. I thought I'd be OK.

Thing is, they were kind of new at doing a run... and it showed. Things were pretty cool until I got about halfway through and suddenly, there were no more signs. I stopped, tried to ask directions, and then farted around until I found approximately where I thought I was supposed to go. Then I finally saw the other sign, and it pointed directly back the way I had just come. Now, by this point, I was pretty much the only one running this part of the course because the rest of the pack had completely passed me by.

I finally figured out the right direction to go and limped along down by the river as what I am certain is exercise induced asthma started to kick in. This made me wheeze and it kind of felt like someone was strangling me. It would have been slightly less bad if it hadn't been for the goose that either thought I was insulting his mother or hitting on him.

That got me to run again.

But you know what, I finished- dead last, but I finished. That's better than not, and miles ahead of never started.

Young male mockingbird stud seeking single female mockingbird with an appreciation for car alarms and backup horns. Come help feather my nest in a spacious, well-wooded apartment complex where the residents feed the birds! Must be willing to relocate, no chicks, serious inquiries only, please.

For the past four nights, a bachelor mockingbird has taken up residence in the tree outside my bedroom window. He has been singing his heart out nonstop every night all night.

This was funny maybe the first time.

I can no longer sleep with the windows open- hell, I can no longer sleep! I had to jam cotton balls in my ears and tell my dog to wake me if the smoke alarm went off, and this was after the shot of whiskey to knock me out. By the way- from newly acquired personal experience, involuntary sleep deprivation is torture, and anyone who says otherwise is banned from my journal effective immediately.

At about 2:30 AM this morning, I looked up in desperation why he was up at such an ungodly hour, and I learned something new. Did you know male mockingbirds sing at night when they're seeking a mate? I didn't either! Mockingbirds are migratory, and are protected species- even if it were legal to harass him, I couldn't bring myself to do it. So, I'm putting out the above personal ad on his behalf. If a female doesn't show up soon, I'm going to look forward to this until the middle of June.

I accidentally set off the smoke alarm this morning. I let a pan get too hot, and when I added butter to it, the whole mess started smoking, and next thing I knew, I was dodging frightened beagles, standing on a stepstool, and trying to shut off the screeching monster on the ceiling before it woke my neighbors up.

Poor Roland. He had his tail between his legs, he was panting and pacing, and was just kind of freaked out. Didn't even settle down after I gave him a treat. He didn't calm down until I took him outside.

Nice to know if there's actually a real fire, Roland's got me covered.

Poll #1367280 The Angry Geologist is Too Fat
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 17

I'm abdominally obese.

You realize I can see everyone who checked that last box, right?

What activity should I do to fix that?

How much did you like phys ed in school (10: loved every minute of it, 1: wanted to burn down the gym)

Favorite form of exercise?

Ticky box?

Nota bene: This is not to discriminate against people of size. You are who you are, and if you're happy and healthy the way you are, more power to you.

Unfortunately, I've got a family history of diabetes that I can't ignore, and my body has been showing signals that all is not well. It finally hit me when I realized my waist had hit 35"- that's a sign of metabolic syndrome, which can lead to diabetes and reduced lung function, like I need any more of that- I needed to lose 10 before I gained 30. Long story short, I'm on my way to killing myself in the same horrific way my paternal grandmother died, and I'm not even really enjoying the ride.

So, I'm going to give it a shot. If I can't manage it on my own, then at least I'll have tried.

Wish me luck. I'll need it.

I am the proud owner of the world's newest TDI certified Therapy Beagle!

:D :D :D

I am so proud of Roland. We worked really hard for this, and it's nice to see it pay off! He's so tired right now, he couldn't even make it all the way to his bed!

On an unrelated note, he also won the title of "Biggest Ears on a Small Dog." Came with a lovely gift bag.

Today, thanks to the magic of Google Books and the New York Times, I found out that there exists out in the Pacific Ocean a tiny island nation called Niue.

The name translates to "Behold the Coconut!"

The fact I live in a world that has a place that is called "Behold the Coconut!" makes it a much happier world indeed.

Today at work, my Minion got called into the bosses' office. This was pretty normal, because she had been working on a few of his projects. I didn't think anything of it at the time. I saw her a little later with performance review forms in her hand, and since it's that time of the year, I asked her how it went.

She said, "Good, but pointless."

I asked her what she meant, and she opened up the folder she had been carrying and handed the top sheet to me. It was a notice of layoff. It was like a bomb went off. The closest story I can compare it to was something I heard my grandfather tell about working in the coal mine. A section of roof had collapsed and killed the man working next to him- he quit that day.

After I stood there for a minute gaping like a dying fish, all I could manage was, "I am so sorry!" Shortly after that it was, "What the hell are they smoking?" But yeah.

She is okay with it. Her husband has a job that takes an Act of Congress to eliminate, and she gets all her benefits through him. They'll have to stretch, but they'll make it- besides, she was glad she got it and not someone who is supporting themselves, or worse, a family.

But we were working on the same projects. And this scares me, quite a bit.

I sat down today and wrote out a contingency plan in case I get the axe next. It involves canceling the cable and... *sniff*... the internet... in the beginning, trying to find temporary work to keep the lights on, and if I don't find a permanent position in the end, moving back home and applying for PhD programs. (Frankly, we're all going to have to be homeless and fighting over dog food before I'll give up Roland. I made a commitment to that dog, and I will keep it.)

I know I'll land on my feet, but that doesn't stop me from being afraid of the fall. Wish me luck.

So, I had a date tonight with the guy I met at the bar two weeks ago. Three things will tell you everything:

1) Nice to look at
2) Not a lot going on between the ears
3) Didn't even pay.

I didn't realize people this unmotivated existed in the modern world. He graduated from high school, got a job in the accounting department of the local newspaper (probably counting bills as they come off the printer), lives with his dad because his stoner roommate was running a farm league prostitution ring out of their shared house, and spends most of the time drinking, drunk, or playing basketball.

Ugh. Quality.

I'm pretty sure he was drunk when I got there, and I know that he didn't understand two damn words I was saying. Honestly, I think I carry on more intelligent conversations with my beagle!

Just... no. Not going to go the dating route with him. No.

When you look at the tissue in your hand and wonder when the Shoggoth crawled up your nose and died, it's probably a good idea to go and see the doctor about your sinus congestion.

Yeah. You all know I'm single. And if you've been reading long, you know what I've written in the past about Valentine's day.

I'm not going to do that this year.

Look, I've read over my friend's list. I know that a lot of you guys are sick of the holiday-bashing. So I'm not going to do that, I swear. But I would like to explain why I've done it in the past- it's not about commercialism, or reducing trauma, or any of the other speculated reasons I've read. It's about human nature.

Okay, so you guys have found someone that makes you feel fantastic. You're happy. And since we're social animals, that means (in one way or another) you tell the world. This is human nature and there's nothing wrong with it.

Meanwhile, all the single people see something that you have and they want. Every single person, no matter who, is jealous of people in healthy, happy relationships, and if they tell you otherwise they are lying out their asses. There is a part of life that single people miss out on, and they experience relationship envy. This is human nature, and as long as us single people keep our envy in check, there is nothing wrong with it.

And there's nothing wrong with having a holiday to celebrate romantic love- it's fantastic! Even better if it's not unrequited! It does tend to rub one's singlehood in one's face, but that's not anyone's fault, is it? The thing that sucks about Valentine's day is that it falls in the middle of February, when it's cold and rainy and still dark at five o'clock and you might have gotten a teaser of spring just warm long enough to really feel it when winter comes back and kicks you in the teeth again, when the debt collectors are knocking at your front door and the tax man is knocking at the back door, and you can't step away from your desk at work, and there's no good fresh food in the grocery store that isn't from a third world country, and the creepy guy that smells like feet won't leave you alone, and all the demons are a little too close to the surface. Then you get a holiday that celebrates romantic love, which you don't have. And it's everywhere. You have a choice to go dig a hole in the woods and sit in it until March, date the creepy guy that smells like feet just so you won't have to spend the evening alone, or snark in self-defense. In this situation, snark generally tends to be the healthiest choice.

So, uh, don't take it personally, or as an assault on the holiday, or as an assault on you and your relationships. It's not anyone's fault that we're all in the situations that we're in, so on behalf of all the single people tonight, I wish you and yours the best, and ask for understanding during a very difficult time of year for the rest of us.

That said, happy Dead Gangster's Day.

My co-worker invited me out to meet her dodgeball team after their game tonight.

Yes. That is what I said. No, I am not kidding.

See, this is really the first time I've been out as a single woman since me and the "dude man" worked it out that we really weren't going to be more than friends. It was an amicable split, and if we weren't on opposite ends of the continent, I'd be thinking differently, but it didn't happen like that.

I got some numbers. And the guys that gave them to me weren't bad looking either. Meh. Might call them on Sunday. It's not like it's the stupidest thing I've ever done.

I know there's some of you here!

Anyone want to help a wiener dog this weekend?

One of my sites had a round of soil samples taken on it last July. The results just came back. The reason for the delay?

They had to full decon the lab for radiation. Twice. Guys said it was the hottest stuff they ever worked with.

I got bit by a tick while I was out there. I'm taking suggestions for superhero names now for when my powers manifest.

So today, two major things happened.

First, they closed another peanut plant down in Texas. This one made roasted and granulated peanuts as well as peanut butter.

Second, I made Kung Pao Chicken for dinner- it was one of those kits. And in the kit was a bag of dry roasted peanuts that I was supposed to cook in the stir fry with the chillies. The two threads of that conversation came together in my brain as I pulled them out of the package, the chicken and veggies already cooking on the stove.

Where did they come from? Were they part of this Peanut Corporation deal? Where were they grown? Where were they roasted? Was the factory safe? A glance at the label answered precisely none of these questions, so I did the only sane thing; I threw them out.

I ate Kung Pao Chicken without the peanuts this time around. I am less than happy about this.

Honest to peat, we need some kind of centralized food regulatory agency, not piecemeal FDA-USDA-ATF-whatever. We need to have one department in charge of everything, and we need to make sure that the places we get our food from are inspected regularly, from family farms to packing plants. This shouldn't be that hard, and I for one would be happy to pay a little bit more per package of Kung Pao Chicken kit if it meant that I was confident enough in the peanuts so that I could have peanuts in my Kung Pao Chicken!

Who's with me?!?

Okay, so I was kind of cheesed off during that last entry about the stimulus. And I did something more about it than bitch on the internet.

I went and looked up my Senators- one was already voting for it, so whatever, but the other one, of course is Arlen Specter, who had actually spoken against the bill. I wrote him a very long email detailing why I thought the pork concerns were so much bull hockey, and pass the bill already.

He was one of the three Republicans that voted for cloture yesterday.

Huh.

Damn.

Is this what having a representative government feels like?

OK- I won't lie. In my field, I'd probably see a pretty big benefit from the current stimulus package. I'm rooting for it to pass in its current form for selfish reasons. I want to have a job, and I want my friends to keep theirs. Some people think it's too heavy on "pork."

But let's take a look at what's being labeled pork:

You can basically organize it into categories based on what Republicans hate. For example, there's the "Fuck public safety" category, in which the $10 million for urban canals and the $100 million to reduce lead paint hazards fall. Then, there's the "Fuck science" category- the $150 million for the Smithsonian and the $412 million for the CDC fits into this one quite nicely. Then there's the favorite "Fuck poor people" category, where we find most of these items, but especially the $1.4 billion for rural waste disposal (read: how DARE those hicks demand to not marinate in their own filth!), $25 million for tribal anti-addiction programs, and $1.2 billion for youth summer job programs. But really, all of these objections can fit into one big box, which sums up the current Republican party's motto pretty well:

"Fuck responsibility."

Last night, I had tea with Robert Oppenheimer, Ghandi, and another gentleman I don't recognize in front of the Mauna Kea Observatory. They invited me to join some sort of secret society dedicated to the betterment of mankind. Or something like that.

I have really freakin' weird dreams sometimes.